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Tuesday, February 9, 2010

My take on romance

I've been reading a lot of blogs this week with romance as the topics because let's face it, Valentine's Day is this weekend. Okay, as you can guess by the lovely photo... my take on romance is going to be a tad bit strange. LOL. I LOVE that photo by the way! Romance and I... we've had an unusual history. You see... I'm not exactly what you'd call normal. All our lives we're told about romance. My example? I was raised to think a romantic man would arrive at the door with flowers and candy when he came to sweep me off my feet. Problem. I'm allergic to flowers! Yeah, kind of sucks but true all the same. I start to sneeze, my eyes water, then start to feel itchy, and my nose starts to itch so I'm rubbing it. VERY attractive on a date. LOL! And candy... I hate hard candies. I never was into them. I do love chocolate though so that at least was a GO for me.
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I was raised to think on anniversaries men bought you gifts like a necklace, a bracelet, or took you out to fancy dinners. SIGH. I am not big on jewelry. I've owned some expensive pieces. I worried to death when it was on me so... I don't wear it. I call them 'dust collectors'. I love cheap costume jewelry but my taste in it... yeah. I try to avoid that for the sake of my children and anyone around me. I kind of go for Gothic or flat out strange stuff on the morbid side. I love silver and not gold. I don't like going to high end restaurants. I am...weird. My idea of the perfect date with my husband... renting movies we really wanted to see... and grabbing our favorite fast food, curling up on the couch in front of the big screen, closing all my dark blue curtains that kill the sun from coming in... and PERFECT! A) I'm with the man I want to be so that's all that matters to me. B) I can be as comfortable as I want C) Movies I want to see plus favorite fast food... YIPPEE and D) We're together so score on all counts and there's cuddling involved.... LOL
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My friends complain to me about the kinds of gifts men give them, buying them crap they don't need or want but they are the traditional, expected gifts. I have to say that I'm damn lucky even though my friends probably arch their eyebrows when I tell them the kind of things I get. LOL. Here's the thing though... I don't want what they want or what they get. Some of the best things I've ever gotten... were things my friends couldn't understand.
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Example? My husband bought me a computer last year. Now in most households this is considered a 'house' purchase or a 'necessity'. We live on tight budget and this was all for me! He knew how much it would mean to me, how much I'd get sheer enjoyment out of it, how it would make my life so much easier, and how badly I wanted one. I wanted to make a go of getting my books out there and I couldn't do it on a laptop that was overheating every 15 minutes and shutting down, losing half of what I wrote because the darn thing didn't save when it said it did! LOL. So... he bought me a computer right before our anniversary. HEART MELT! OMG... Best gift ever!
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Isn't that what it's about? Someone doing something sweet for you to make your life better? To show their love? To give you something that shows you that they KNOW you, they GET you, and they LOVE you enough to do something just to see you smile? That computer beat the crap out of any fancy dinner he could have taken me to, paled in comparison to any shiny piece of jewelry he could have bought me. He GETS me. He KNOWS what I love, what I NEED, what I dream about... and got bonus points for doing it when I knew damn well we couldn't afford it. Now that was my idea of one hell of a loving, romantic gesture. LOL. I was so damn touched... so happy... so WOW, he loves me, he really, really, really loves me... and my friends were eyeing each other going... "It's a computer." Yeah. I really love my friends so I don't bop them in the head to knock the point in. They don't own computers so... clueless! LOL.
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Some of the most romantic things...
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He brings me candy bars because he knows I sometimes have a hard day... just because he wants me to smile. Sometimes I wake up on weekends and he's picked up the house and done the dishes so I don't have to. Isn't that damn sweet? Cooking dinner sometimes because I had a hard day and he just wants to help out and make my day easier. That's hot! That's sweet! That melts me. LOL. We cuddle on the couch. 20 years and he STILL opens my doors and kisses me the minute he walks in the door. The other day the kids were ALL home sick. Yeah. That's SO NOT a treat. Out of the blue he suddenly sends me an email telling me he knows my day is rough, he's thinking about me and wanted to tell me he loves me. OMG. I got teary eyed. That was just so damn thoughtful and wonderful for him to take time out to send me a message of love just because he knew the kids were driving me nuts. LOL. He always does those little things that shows me loves me. That's damn romantic to me.
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So that's my take on romance. I think it's not about what the gift is... I think it's all about getting something for someone you love that will touch their heart, will show that you GET them, that you KNOW them... and will make them smile. So... if your husband wants that unromantic video game or that Die Hard movie DVD collection... Go for it. Buy it and snub your nose at traditional gifts and go right for his heart.
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If you feel like sharing... I'd love to hear your take on romance and the best gift you were given that you thought was romantic even though it wasn't typical or what you'd like to get that would make your friends arch their eyebrows. LOL.

4 comments:

  1. Beautiful post, Laurann, and you're so right!

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  2. Hi Helen,

    Thanks! Odd gifts... WORK! LOL!

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  3. I'm the kind who try to remeber what my guy said 6 month ago he would want. Then I buy it and thinks OMG he is so gonna like this..... and the next day he goes to the shop and change it for something else.... So now I don't get him anything.... except a piece of me and a kiss. LOL

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  4. feringhee,

    It's the thought that counts and that's awesome that you remember what he said and try to get him something he'd love. And the best thing you can give someone... is yourself and your time. Truly Priceless! Happy Valentine's Day this weekend.

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